Airplanes VS Women

This forum is for non aviation related topics, political debate, random thoughts, and everything else that just doesn't seem to fit in the normal forums. ALL FORUM RULES STILL APPLY.

Moderators: sky's the limit, sepia, Sulako, lilfssister, North Shore

Locked
Thelma & Louise
Rank 0
Rank 0
Posts: 3
Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2005 6:42 pm

Airplanes VS Women

Post by Thelma & Louise »

There's Just No Comparison?!!
---------- ADS -----------
 
Thelma & Louise
Rank 0
Rank 0
Posts: 3
Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2005 6:42 pm

Post by Thelma & Louise »

Yeah Baby!!! All You Boys Know U Can't Fly withOut US!!
---------- ADS -----------
 
User avatar
Hoov
Rank 5
Rank 5
Posts: 393
Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2006 11:35 am

Post by Hoov »

-planes don't abuse you
-they don't call you lazy
-they don't make you do laundry
-they dont bitch about hygeine
-they don't tell others embarrassing facts once they have had a few to many to drink
-They never mention size
-planes never laugh at your jokes but at least they don't call them stupid
-planes don't have armpits/legs but if they did they would always shave them
-planes don't demand breakfast in bed
-planes don't impose sex sanctions

the negative of planes

they have very wide vaginas
---------- ADS -----------
 
I carry my crucifix
Under my deathlist
Forward my mail to me in hell
Liars and the martyrs
Lost faith in The Father
Long lost in the wishing well

Wild side
User avatar
Sideshow
Rank 3
Rank 3
Posts: 111
Joined: Fri May 27, 2005 9:07 pm
Location: BC DME

Post by Sideshow »

What about female pilots?
---------- ADS -----------
 
...and then I got paid to fly....
desksgo
Rank 10
Rank 10
Posts: 2850
Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2004 12:05 pm
Location: Toy Poodle Town, Manitoba
Contact:

Post by desksgo »

Airplanes don't bake pie. @#$! airplanes. I like boobies.
---------- ADS -----------
 
User avatar
32a
Rank 2
Rank 2
Posts: 83
Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2004 12:52 am
Location: CYQQ

Why Are Airplanes Better than Women

Post by 32a »

Airplanes don't take forever to warm up
You can keep an airplane from stalling
Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch
An airplane won't slap you for being a 'bush pilot'
An airplane doesn't ask you to put on a raincoat before entry
You can easily leave an airplane before sunrise
Airplane exhaust fumes smell better
An airplane does not get mad if you 'touch and go'
An airplane will not get mad if you ride someone else's airplane
An airplane's cockpit is cleaner (and smells better)
You can still activate a fifty year old airplane
Airplane's don't droop after many years of service
An airplane moves when you tell it to
An airplane will kill you quick . . . a woman takes her time
An airplane does not object to a preflight inspection
An airplane will let you use your dip stick anytime you want
Airplanes don't make you 'pull-out' to eject
You can change the looks of an airplane
Airplanes come with manuals
When you put fuel into an airplane, it does not spit it out
Airplanes don't get pregnant
You can fly a airplane any time of the month
You can share your airplanes with your friends
If your airplane makes too much noise, you can buy a muffler
If your airplane is too loose, you can tighten it
You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your airplane
You can fly an airplane as long as you want and it won't get sore
Your parents don't remain in touch with your old airplane after you dump it
Airplanes always feel like going for a ride
Airplanes don't insult you if you are a bad pilot
It's always OK to use tie downs on your airplane
Airplanes don't care if you are late
You don't have to take a shower before flying your airplane
If you say bad things to your airplane, you don't have to say your sorry before you can fly it again
Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown
When flying, you and your airplane both arrive at the same time
Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have
Airplanes don't mind if you look at other airplane's, or if you buy airplane magazines
---------- ADS -----------
 
The probability of survival is dependent on the angle of arrival.
Wasn't Me
Rank 6
Rank 6
Posts: 456
Joined: Thu Apr 08, 2004 5:08 pm

Post by Wasn't Me »

Ok I think I'm in Love!! :)
---------- ADS -----------
 
I wish I could spell
Pete
Rank 7
Rank 7
Posts: 534
Joined: Tue Feb 22, 2005 11:39 pm

Post by Pete »

Airplanes don't take forever to warm up
You can keep an airplane from stalling
Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch
An airplane won't slap you for being a 'bush pilot'
An airplane doesn't ask you to put on a raincoat before entry
You can easily leave an airplane before sunrise
Airplane exhaust fumes smell better
An airplane does not get mad if you 'touch and go'
An airplane will not get mad if you ride someone else's airplane
An airplane's cockpit is cleaner (and smells better)
You can still activate a fifty year old airplane
Airplane's don't droop after many years of service
An airplane moves when you tell it to
An airplane will kill you quick . . . a woman takes her time
An airplane does not object to a preflight inspection
An airplane will let you use your dip stick anytime you want
Airplanes don't make you 'pull-out' to eject
You can change the looks of an airplane
Airplanes come with manuals
When you put fuel into an airplane, it does not spit it out
Airplanes don't get pregnant
You can fly a airplane any time of the month
You can share your airplanes with your friends
If your airplane makes too much noise, you can buy a muffler
If your airplane is too loose, you can tighten it
You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your airplane
You can fly an airplane as long as you want and it won't get sore
Your parents don't remain in touch with your old airplane after you dump it
Airplanes always feel like going for a ride
Airplanes don't insult you if you are a bad pilot
It's always OK to use tie downs on your airplane
Airplanes don't care if you are late
You don't have to take a shower before flying your airplane
If you say bad things to your airplane, you don't have to say your sorry before you can fly it again
Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown
When flying, you and your airplane both arrive at the same time
Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have
Airplanes don't mind if you look at other airplane's, or if you buy airplane magazines
Can you bang an airplane? I bet the guy who made this up has probably tried though. :lol:
---------- ADS -----------
 
niss
Top Poster
Top Poster
Posts: 6745
Joined: Sat Jun 25, 2005 8:54 pm
Location: I'm a CPL trapped in a PPL's Body.
Contact:

Post by niss »

Sometimes if its one of those days I end up banging my plane.... but then i just try to get 'er down a bit softer.
---------- ADS -----------
 
She’s built like a Steakhouse, but she handles like a Bistro.

Let's kick the tires, and light the fires.... SHIT! FIRE! EMERGENCY CHECKLIST!
fatso
Rank 1
Rank 1
Posts: 22
Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2005 5:07 pm

Post by fatso »

that was priceless
---------- ADS -----------
 
YYC the place to be
Rank 3
Rank 3
Posts: 172
Joined: Wed Apr 06, 2005 8:43 am
Location: Calgary Alberta Canada

Post by YYC the place to be »

They are equal. I love to look at them both, and there is nothing like being inside of them.
---------- ADS -----------
 
SkyWolfe
Rank (9)
Rank (9)
Posts: 1483
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2005 7:18 pm
Location: CYVR

Post by SkyWolfe »

Wow, I can pretty much say all the same things when you compare men to airplanes ;)
---------- ADS -----------
 
Jimmy Mack
Rank 2
Rank 2
Posts: 69
Joined: Tue Sep 05, 2006 6:49 pm

Post by Jimmy Mack »

SkyWolfe wrote:Wow, I can pretty much say all the same things when you compare men to airplanes ;)
even about being inside of them? You hang out with some freaky dudes young lady.

JM
---------- ADS -----------
 
w squared
Rank 10
Rank 10
Posts: 2040
Joined: Wed Apr 14, 2004 2:32 pm
Location: Somewhere in the patch

Post by w squared »

You might want to step away from the strap-on, young lady...
---------- ADS -----------
 
Image

Please don't tell my mother that I work in the Oilpatch...she still thinks that I'm the piano player at a whorehouse.
SkyWolfe
Rank (9)
Rank (9)
Posts: 1483
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2005 7:18 pm
Location: CYVR

Post by SkyWolfe »

Hence the words "pretty much" :roll:

Im far too lazy to go though each ones and pick out the things that don't apply. Im a pilot too you know :P
---------- ADS -----------
 
Hedley
Top Poster
Top Poster
Posts: 10430
Joined: Thu May 27, 2004 6:40 am
Location: CYSH
Contact:

Post by Hedley »

The best thing about an airplane is that anytime you want, you can ignore them for as long as you want, and spend as much time as you want, inside other airplanes. Try THAT with a woman ...
---------- ADS -----------
 
w squared
Rank 10
Rank 10
Posts: 2040
Joined: Wed Apr 14, 2004 2:32 pm
Location: Somewhere in the patch

Post by w squared »

Point well taken...but you have to understand that no matter how many cookies you share with us, it doesn't change the fact that if you dig a hole and stand in front of it, we're probably going to push you in :D
---------- ADS -----------
 
Image

Please don't tell my mother that I work in the Oilpatch...she still thinks that I'm the piano player at a whorehouse.
w squared
Rank 10
Rank 10
Posts: 2040
Joined: Wed Apr 14, 2004 2:32 pm
Location: Somewhere in the patch

Post by w squared »

So you've implying that you have been inside a woman that smells like a slaughter house in july? Maybe you should stick to Ms. Rosie Palm, cap.
---------- ADS -----------
 
Image

Please don't tell my mother that I work in the Oilpatch...she still thinks that I'm the piano player at a whorehouse.
Hedley
Top Poster
Top Poster
Posts: 10430
Joined: Thu May 27, 2004 6:40 am
Location: CYSH
Contact:

Post by Hedley »

you have been inside a woman that smells like a slaughter house in july?
One of the "advantages" of living up north :wink:
---------- ADS -----------
 
User avatar
Redneck_pilot86
Rank (9)
Rank (9)
Posts: 1330
Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 12:47 pm
Location: between 60 and 70

Post by Redneck_pilot86 »

Some of the planes flying fish smell like...well...fish.
---------- ADS -----------
 
The only three things a wingman should ever say: 1. "Two's up" 2. "You're on fire" 3. "I'll take the fat one"
...
Rank 11
Rank 11
Posts: 4581
Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2004 7:18 pm

Post by ... »

OK....enuf with the direction this is goin'.

Despite women being the more...ummm calculating, smarter of the two sexes, we can at least try to be a little cleverer with replies here. You're all making us look bad with grade 8 comments.

:wink:
---------- ADS -----------
 
SkyWolfe
Rank (9)
Rank (9)
Posts: 1483
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2005 7:18 pm
Location: CYVR

Post by SkyWolfe »

*offers everyone a cookie*

All better...
---------- ADS -----------
 
w squared
Rank 10
Rank 10
Posts: 2040
Joined: Wed Apr 14, 2004 2:32 pm
Location: Somewhere in the patch

Post by w squared »

Your avatar has me wondering, SkyWolfe...Do you happen to share your home with an orange tabby?
---------- ADS -----------
 
Image

Please don't tell my mother that I work in the Oilpatch...she still thinks that I'm the piano player at a whorehouse.
Kilo-Kilo
Rank 7
Rank 7
Posts: 623
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2006 2:47 pm
Location: West Coast

Post by Kilo-Kilo »

I am Birddog wrote: we can at least try to be a little cleverer with replies here.
If you've already climbed in up front, the plane won't complain if your best buddy is jamming his gear in the baggage compartment.....

THANK YOU! I'M HERE ALL WEEK! DON'T FORGET TO TIP YOUR WAITRESS! BE SURE TO TRY THE BEEF DIP - AT $3.99 IT'S A REAL STEAL! THE NEXT DANCER IS SHANIA AND SHE'LL BE ON AT 8:15! GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY,
---------- ADS -----------
 
Locked

Return to “The Water Cooler”