Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

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C-FABH
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by C-FABH »

Try bringing an EMPTY water bottle through security, the same "container size" rule will confuse them.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by sky's the limit »

I'm fairly certain I almost got arrested in Whitehorse about a month ago.

I'd just time ex'd, flown out of camp on a few minutes notice, drove from Mayo to Whitehorse and went to the airport. I happened to forget my Engineer had given me a specialized wrench to remove a particular line on the engine... It was in one of my two carry-on's. Needless to say they jumped up and down with glee when that bag went through the scanner and told me they were going to inspect my bag.

In this bag was my helmet, $2000, GPS, etc., lots of expensive stuff. So I said, "I'll open that." "No Sir, step back from the bag, that's our job...." I replied, "I don't care if it's your job, it's my stuff, and it's expensive." Do I opened it, they got rather pissed.

Back and forth it went, and I was getting increasingly pissed off. So, we finally get to the wrench, I tell them it's not mine, it's very expensive and they say "you can't have tools." So I guess the GPS, flight helmet, and gloves are all OK, but a 5 inch wrench is not.

I said, "I'm not about to blow up you damn plane, I just want to get home." Back comes, "I don't care if you're going to blow up the plane, the rules say that wrench can't go....." :shock:

Really. I'm with Clunk, I don't know how any of you can deal with that shit on a daily basis.


stl
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ettw
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by ettw »

so did you get to keep the wrench STL?

Cheers,

ETTW
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small penguin
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by small penguin »

Meanwhile I get to fly in and out of the same airports in my little puddle jumper carrying a 1.5liter water bottle, two backpacks crammed with stuff, and two jerry cans of fuel. No, they dont suspect me at all!

Its funny how the aviation safety rules are.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by sky's the limit »

ettw wrote:so did you get to keep the wrench STL?

Cheers,

ETTW

Nope.

And when the Engineer came through a week later and asked for it, the answer was "we destroyed it...." In other words they stole it.


stl
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Changes in Latitudes
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by Changes in Latitudes »

C-FABH wrote:Try bringing an EMPTY water bottle through security, the same "container size" rule will confuse them.
That's funny...I am a bit of a recycling nazi, so if I have a bottle I'll usually just tuck it in the bag until I see a blue bin. They've always told me not to worry about it as it is empty. A little consistancy would probably be good when it comes to airport security.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by Old Dog Flying »

How about the VM Security Klutz at YVR who wanted to take the AC Captain's wings off his jacket because they were considered a weapon? The VM SK locked the door to the passage to the aircraft when our friend said something like "You asshole, these are my weapons and I fly the aircraft". Departure was about an hour late when the Capt and F/O had to walk down through the bowels of the terminal to get to the aircraft.

OR..wife and I going stateside via YVR ...6:00 AM departure and VM female SK was busy putting on her make-up and just waved us through.

Or the Very Highly Decoratefd 83 year old WW2 pilot (USA) with his Congressional Medal of Honor in his pocket had it confiscated because of the danger that it imposed. The heavily armed National Guard Sgt was shown the medal and he did not know what it was!

I hate flying airlines

Barney
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by Grantmac »

Last time I went through security I presented military ID along with my boarding pass, guess who got "randomly selected" for a frisking? I mean common guys, I am literally an Anti-Terrorist.
I too had to leave my 113ml tube that was 2/3rds full of toothpaste at the counter, god knows how much shit I could blow-up with that peppermint colgate!
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2milefinal
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by 2milefinal »

I like when for weeks I get through screening with the same bag and stuff with no problem. And then they find/see something on the xray. Last week it was a screwdriver (came with my new sunglasses). Didnt even know I had it in the bag. I bet that thing was missed at least a dozen times.
By the way I timed the search for that screwdriver, it took them 8 min 45 secs to find it.
Somebody please stop the madness.
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young grasshopper
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by young grasshopper »

I had a buddy of mine check in his bags in YEG after a hard weekend of boozing, women, and complete debauchery (spelling nerds - feel free). He was heading back to YZF, and got a bit nervous when he heard his name paged over the entire airport requesting him to proceed directly to baggage something-or-other. They gave him quite the stare down and asked him if there was anything he'd like to tell them. He was dumbfounded. They asked if he wanted the police involved and that it was his right to speak to a lawyer!! They showed him the x-ray and he started laughing. It turns out he brought a left-over six pack in his suitcase (beer in YZF is pricey)...not a biggy, right? WELL...apparently when the chords from your i-pod are strung around the top of your six-pack, and your alarm clock happens to be sitting on top of that contraption, it tends excite security. Sorry - a bit off the CATSA thread...but I laugh everytime they ask if they can open my bag because I always think of my buddy...

No worries there Young YEG is spelled correctly 8) - JC
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by shankdown »

CATSA folks tend to come across as substandard human beings, I agree.

At an empty YVR security checkpoint:

Me: Walk through security, with everything metal removed, except my belt, which I forgot. Machine beeps.
CATSA man: Take your belt off
Me: Take belt off, walk through, no beep.
CATSA man, 2 seconds after my first attempt: You've been selected for an additional screening.
Me: Roll my eyes, because there was no point in removing my belt if the guy was gonna give me the special treatment.
CATSA man: Pats down with extreme care an attention, my entire bare arms and hands, as I was wearing a t-shirt. Both arms, down the top side of my arm, up the bottom.

These are the people that they select to screen. The have no choice to take them, as people this dumb have good jobs elsewhere. Patting down people's bare skin. I could go on, but I feel my blood pressure rising already.

Shankdown
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by stopsquawk »

2milefinal wrote:I like when for weeks I get through screening with the same bag and stuff with no problem. And then they find/see something on the xray. Last week it was a screwdriver (came with my new sunglasses). Didnt even know I had it in the bag. I bet that thing was missed at least a dozen times.
By the way I timed the search for that screwdriver, it took them 8 min 45 secs to find it.
Somebody please stop the madness.
It pays to know what you are and are not allowed to carry. Those little eyeglass screwdrivers are allowed.

http://www.catsa-acsta.gc.ca/english/tr ... ndscissors

I've been passing through security in YVR and YYC regularly on deadheads with my bag full of pilot stuff, and I've never had a problem. I even have a small multi-tip screwdriver thing that's never been found. I guess it looks like a pen on xray. I just smile politely and make sure my crew tags and RAIC are in view, and I don't have a problem.

And I never, EVER beep. I've got it down to a science.
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2milefinal
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by 2milefinal »

stopsquawk wrote:
It pays to know what you are and are not allowed to carry. Those little eyeglass screwdrivers are allowed.
No..no..nooo I was told no tools whats so ever. :smt014
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Northern Skies
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by Northern Skies »

I have been avoiding airline travel for this reason. I've been driving or taking the greyhound. My own industry be damned, I'm not putting up with that shit. I have little to no patience at all for mindless bureaucrats. Considering the extensive and quite creative tongue-lashing I recently gave a student loans agent, I doubt I can handle catsa in this day and age. How do you airport dwellers do it?

When my pax bring a gun on the plane, the only challenge they get is "you've double checked it's unloaded, right? good... what is it? Oh yeah, i've got one of those, it really kicks eh?" If each and every one of them is NOT carrying a knife, it's a bad thing. This is the good life, one of reason.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by sky's the limit »

The only "tools" allowed are waving the wands and standing behind the screens....


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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by NJ »

I was traveling out of YZF last winter and got called over the PA. They call me to the special area and ask "We just want to know what's in the bag." I happened to have a pneumatic drill in there, and they show me the x-ray. It looks like a drill, but they go ahead and tell me where the trigger of the gun is. I let them open up the gift wrap (xmas present) and they confirm that it isn't a gun. Surprise surprise I was randomly searched and eventually get out of winter hell. Upon returning I go back to work at the airport control tower where I'm responsible for the safety of every plane at YZF and EN9.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by Doc »

What do you expect from a bunch of grade three grads? I'd way rather drive. These people are rude, abusive morons. I personally have absolutely NO use for airport passenger screening. Random "pat downs" my ass! I'd rather walk. It's a bloody joke! "What do you need a headset for...." Should have been replied to with..."None of YOUR fucking business...."

You can try to be polite to these people, but they have an IQ of about 12.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by synthpro »

They are ALL quite stupid actually.

High school dropouts. Lowest common denominator next to a Taxi driver.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by Strega »

My strategy when dealing with thise morons, is to simply pretend you cant hear, or understand them them when they ask you questions, and then when they ask you a question lets say "what is this used for?" your reply is "yes".... Just pretend your some ignorant old SOB from texas trying to understand a fresh off the boat person from China.. Its kind of a blast!

:o
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by Old Dog Flying »

Going on a florida holiday with a digital camera and an old Canon AE1 with plenty of film, I asked the Security type for a hand search of my camera bags rather than ruin the film with the Xray machine and just my luck, the creap could not speak English. After 3 attempts to make myself understood, a supervisor came over and asked me to turn on the cameras. No problem sez I with the little digital...click, flash..Oh shit in her eyes. Then the Canon..you don't just turn it on, but try to explain this to someone with single digit IQ.

Then she wanted me to remove the lense so that she could stick her finger into the mirror system...single lens reflex...then I lost it.

At the time I was having a great deal of trouble walking due to a badly damaged foot. Now the two TSA Agents wanted to pat me down, look down the front of my pants...piss off sez I and take my shoes off. They were told that unless they provided me with a chair The shoes stayed on. I tied up the damned idiot duo for 30 minutes and in the end swore that I would never fly out of KSEA again.

Then I find out that there is a very large percentage of illegal immigrants working for the screening companies...

And they are no better on our side of the border...

Old Dog... while I understand and can commiserate with your comments, if you want to contiue to post here, couth up your comments. There is a simple outline of your rules posted at the head of every forum. Take the time to read them.
JC
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by 2R »

So what happens if they actually find a BOMB while searching a bag ???
Has anyone actually seen a bomb pit close to the security areas where a bomb could be blown up without causing major harm to people or structures in the area ???None of the searchers are armed and do not look like they could fight a maniac armed with a bomb .I have not seen anyone capable of a nuetralizing CNS anywhere near a security area in Canada.
All the money that is spent on airport security and yet not one airport that i have been in has any pressure relief in the structure to allow the gas made in an explosion to escape the building without causing pressure damage(lung collapse) to those in the building or any means to quickly evacuate the gasses from the explosion.
The fumes are not always healthy and can be made to be fatal (against the geneva convention)
And yet not one smoke hood or emergency oxygen escape packs anywhere to be seen to aid in the rescue of pax if they were to set off a bomb in the security area ,before any secondary explosions that are usually set to get the rescue crew arrive.
And all that glass used in modern airports without any anti-splinter film on the inside .Most people would die from the flying glass in a car bomb or truck bomb .The film on the inside would save lives.
And these guys look out those windows every day and see no threat at all :shock: :shock:

It is insecurity not security .
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small penguin
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by small penguin »

2R you have very good points. Unfortunately the system cant work that way. Seeing a bomb pit, reinforced structure, or emergency air vents would only create fear for anyone at the airport. Not to mention airport terminals would loose a lot of aesthetic appeal and beauty. Something managers dont want.

Rather, Western civilization relies more on the false sense of security. As you said, if a terrorist cant blow up an airplane, they can easily take down part of an airport terminal. Likewise, something I find is a huge security risk is that while passengers (and it seems crew as well) on commercial airlines get poked and prodded in areas even the sun dont shine, the GA community slips right by all that. I've landed in both small and International (read 'International' not 'big and busy') airports, and have been able to always get passed any form of checking, aside from simply showing credentials (in this case, pilot licence and medical). I've never had baggage inspected, nor have I had to walk through a metal detector.

But the problem is two-way. If you provide too little security, and you end up being a target, anyone (terrorist, Johnny, criminal, etc) can take advantage and make a mess. Too much security (in an airport) and you simply drive away customers, create an atmosphere of fear and panic, and show to the world that "they" (in this day and age; terrorism) have won.

Another roadblock is cost.

In computing, software has three main features: Security, ease of use, functionality. Each of these attributes is on the tips of a triangle. Place a dot anywhere in that triangle, and thats how your software will work. It may be very secure, but given that the dot is very near the 'security' corner, that means the software is not easy to use (ie: could require multiple passwords) and that same software may not be very functional (ie: doesnt work outside the office). You have to balance it out.
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by SQ »

Northern Skies wrote:I have been avoiding airline travel for this reason. I've been driving or taking the greyhound.
it might gonna change in few months

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/manitoba/story ... anada.html
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by ettw »

And all of this is how those pricks who planned and flew the jets on 9/11 really won....the huge expense and hassle imposed on all of us in the last 7 years....the cost mounts.

ETTW
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Re: Hats of to all of you!I would end up killing a CATSA employe

Post by just curious »

I'm looking forward to my 32nd "random search" in YZF tomorrow. :evil:
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