Don't be a whore (help me respond to an email)

[Invertago]

Just looking for an insightful response to this offer to work for free that arrived in my work inbox this morning. (Interestingly I've heard a lot about how you can get your CPL MIFR in the philippines for the price of a few bribes)

"Dear
Sir

My name is EDITED , i am a myanmar citizen i am currently holding a CPL IR with Multi rating from the philippines i would like to know if it is possible for me to apply for a job in your company. I am not looking for paid job i just want to get experience. I hope you can help thank you so much.


Best Regards
EDITED "

I have not yet replied to the email, but I am open to your creative avcanadian responses. Write a response, or vote for someone elses responses, the top response will be replied back tomorrow!


Grand prize for this contest is one (1) sense of self respect. Residents of Quebec are not eligible. Must be 18 years of age or older, no purchase necessary.

[Hedley]

*** edited ***

[Strega]

My response,,


Dear sir,

We currently have an opening in our ground ops division for a qualified person such as yourself, duties include cleaning the bathrooms, with strict attention to the toilets, as this is a time/experience building position, it is without pay. Upgrades to aircraft fueller and or cleaner usually occur within 24 months of employment.

Thank you.

[Pirate Pete]

Dear Sir;

I am very excited about having you as an employee. You are exactly the type of company-minded induvidual we are looking for. Currently our only opening is in Yellowknife. If you could please make your way out there as soon as possible, we will be happy to get you into a plane and flying for us.

Please send your arrival information to us, and we will have someone waiting for you at the airport to pick you up and bring you to the provided crew accomidations.

Look forward to seeing you soon!

Make sure he books his flights, and send him a confirmation email. And then sit back and laugh.

[Just another canuck]

Am I the only one who thinks you should give the poor guy a break and be honest with him... perhaps give him some much needed advice??

He is, after all, from Myanmar and is simply looking to break into an industry that he is obviously passionate about.

Send me his email address and I'll help him out if all you're going to do is shoot him down. He doesn't deserve that.

[tesox2]

Perhaps you @#%&*s should consider the source...heres a guy who seems to want a better life. He lives in a country where the 2008 inflation rate was over 20%, the average annual income is only $2600 usd, 37% of the population lives below poverty, 10% is unemployed and those employed are likely involved in the opium trade, sex trade or forced labour. Im sure if those conditions prevailed here, many of you would 'whore' yourselves to some overindulging, spoiled, disrespecting company too...I think your attitudes do not reflect a respectful response...in fact they are down right disgusting.

[Sidebar]

Dear Wannabe,

We have many applicants willing to work for free, most of them with better credentials than you possess. However, should you wish to pay us for the privilege of working for us, your plea would receive a more favourable rating.

E.X. Ploiter

[Just another canuck]

(Interestingly I've heard a lot about how you can get your CPL MIFR in the philippines for the price of a few bribes)

You heard that? Really? Care to share the source, because I think you're full of shit. I've met pilots from there... also from Indonesia, Thailand, Vietnam... I don't think any of them got their licenses for the "price of a few bribes."

[Invertago]

Perhaps you @#%&*s should consider the source...heres a guy who seems to want a better life. He lives in a country where the 2008 inflation rate was over 20%, the average annual income is only $2600 usd, 37% of the population lives below poverty, 10% is unemployed and those employed are likely involved in the opium trade, sex trade or forced labour. Im sure if those conditions prevailed here, many of you would 'whore' yourselves to some overindulging, spoiled, disrespecting company too...I think your attitudes do not reflect a respectful response...in fact they are down right disgusting.

I already considered that and...
If he can afford a CPL MIFR, and afford to work for free, he likely isn't coming from the lower $ income levels. The only people who can afford the training and work for free have $ behind them no matter which country you come from. Also, typically the richest people come from the poorest countries, (got rich off the backs of the poor, land of extremes, no middle class)

[niss]

Dear Sir,

Thank you for your application to our company. It is true that we have positions available, these positions are given assuming you perform a Proficiency Checkout and training. We make this training available for the sum of $8000.00. If you do not have the means of raising these funds, I can put you in touch with a contact of mine in Nigeria. All you need to do is claim his inheritance (his father was the disposed King of Nigeria, due to the political circumstance he is unable to claim it himself) and send him the amount minus the $8000.00 you require for training.

Please be advised that our training regiment is the strictest around. We will make you one hell of a pilot. Your training regiment starts each morning with calisthenics where you are expected to be able to do one arm handstands while levitating rocks around you with your mind. After this exercise you will be expected to do a 2km run with a green midget strapped to your back. We expect our pilots to be available for anything at any time and our pilots must be ready both physically and mentally.

Your ground school classes will run for most of the day when you will sit in a room full of the other students and all the homo-erotic sexual tension you can stand. Remember there is no points for second place! You must always be your best.

After ground school there is more Physical Fitness in the form of beach volleyball. These volleyball sessions are mandatory as are the showers afterward. Again, these are full of homo-erotic sexual tension.

These ground school classes occur every other day. On the days you are not in the class you will be flying with your instructor. You are expected to display proper technique and proficiency in your stick and rudder skills as well as your professionalism on the radio. Clear communication is key always ask the tower before performing a flyby. With out sufficient warning tower members may spill coffee on themselves and "want some butts!" (see volleyball and showers above).

As mentioned above we will test you both physically and mentally. Half way through your training session we will inexplicably kill your First Officer. This is both to prepare you for how to deal with the aircraft single crew as well as see how you are capable of handling the stress. Our resident nurse Kelly McGillis is on standby should you need someone to help you get through the loss of your FO.

As part of our psychological training you will also be locked in a theater constantly playing scenes from the 1930's war epic Hells Angles. You will stay in this room for a few days where you will receive chocolate chip cookies and bottles of milk for sustenance. Please relieve yourself in the empty bottles of milk (helpful tip for long flight! We cannot afford a delay just because you have to pee.)

Should you pass our training regiment you will be awarded a set of cloth wings (at your expense $9.99) that are to be sewn to your company provided (at your expense $499.00) leather jacket. Please be advised that this be worn at all times along with large aviator style glasses, a timepiece (able to tell time not necessary), black pants, white shirt with captain bars, and a tie.

Once all this is complete you are considered sufficiently skilled to fly our fleet of Cessna 172s and Piper Cherokees. These aircraft are the best of the best. You will be assigned missions that will test your skills day to day. Just remember that as the PIC you are responsible for the aircraft, especially since we are no longer insurable so you are also financially responsible for the aircraft.

I hope to hear back from you shortly, our last crew died in a horrible plane vs. ground accident, but do not worry, this was not reported. We have a strict policy of maintaining our pilots dignity and reputation. In the (un)likely event that you perish while in our employ, our companies health benefits cover the cost of recovering your watch and sunglasses from the crater. Should these be too damaged to resell and cover the cost (YOUR COST see PIC aircraft responsibility above) of the aircraft these will be sent to your family via courier (collect).

Respectfully,

Invertago
Chief Pilot For Now

[Brewguy]

Dear Sir,

Canada does not recognize the existence of "Myanmar"; we therefore deem you to be from "Burma". Please edit your original email accordingly and resend it.

[Ogee]

Am I the only one who thinks you should give the poor guy a break and be honest with him... perhaps give him some much needed advice??

He doesn't deserve that.

No you're not the only one. Yes, he doesn't deserve that.

[AMM]

Send him the link to this thread. It would offer him a greater spectrum of feedback.

[Slats]

I can't believe some of these responses. Everyone here loves to jump up and down and scream and yell about new pilots working for crap wages in an attempt to break into the industry claiming that that's what's wrong with our industry. I'll be the first to admit that it doesn't help, but neither do the infantile attitudes displayed here. Most everyone here wants to call themself a professional yet can't deal with a total stranger in a respectful and professional manner. At least not from behind the computer monitor; probably not too many would have the gall to be such a total prick to a person's face.

[itismedd]

First of all he doesnt deserve to be called a "whore". Just like you dont deserve to be called what your employees call you.

Why dont you reply the same way you would when you get a resume. If you dont want to do that try this:

Dear Edited,

Thank you for your interest in "company X". Yes we are currently looking for pilots or No we are not looking for pilots at this time(which ever applies). I admire your eagerness to fly so much that you are willing to work for free, however we feel that it is not in your best interest nor ours to allow you to do that. Please forward your resume for review. If you meet the qualifications we will contact you for an interview. Again thank you for your interest and good luck in your job search.

Company X

[Invertago]

Well, this has certainly turned out to be a juicy can of worms, and to think I thought I'd be bored in the office all day today. Avcanada never fails to entertain.


Anyhow, I'm not his career councilor, though I have helped a few people who send me resumes find work at other companies I know, they where looking for paid work.

For those who feel sorry for the guy, how would you feel if I just applied for your job and offered to do it for free? A friend of mine just got "let go" do to bad the bad economy. He was replaced by a new guy working for free to log the hours.

I can't believe some of these responses. Everyone here loves to jump up and down and scream and yell about new pilots working for crap wages in an attempt to break into the industry claiming that that's what's wrong with our industry. I'll be the first to admit that it doesn't help, but neither do the infantile attitudes displayed here. Most everyone here wants to call themself a professional yet can't deal with a total stranger in a respectful and professional manner. At least not from behind the computer monitor; probably not too many would have the gall to be such a total prick to a person's face.

I should add that what ever I send from a company email address will have to be censored for politeness / political correctness, but this thread is giving good material.

[itismedd]

I think being let go only to have your job replaced by a volunteer is one thing( and your right should never happen and the employer should be have their ass kicked for taking advantage of both of the parties involved). However a person deciding to volunteer at a place to gain experience when there are no positions avalable at that place at that time is another, yes it also shouldnt happen but it is another.

[Brewguy]

Volunteering to work for a non-profit organization whose membership is made up of volunteers is one thing; volunteering to work for a for-profit company is entirely another.

For those getting bent out of shape over the tone / nature of responses - what exactly did you expect from the bunch of people that frequent this forum? Despite there being some great discussions on here, and some genuine advise given on parts of the forum (example flight training); In general, the avcanada membership is not world renowned for political correctness and tact.

One would think that the person at a company who gets and responds to employment enquiries would know the type of response that is expected / appropriate for that company. I mean really, leaving the response up to a bunch of random people on the internet... not a good idea.

But some of the 'responses' given have been good entertainment for an otherwise lousy Wednesday.

[Invertago]

(Interestingly I've heard a lot about how you can get your CPL MIFR in the philippines for the price of a few bribes)

You heard that? Really? Care to share the source, because I think you're full of shit. I've met pilots from there... also from Indonesia, Thailand, Vietnam... I don't think any of them got their licenses for the "price of a few bribes."

I've worked at schools where many of the students where international students and they shared they're experiences from the Philippines. I've worked with some instructors who worked overseas and saw it first hand. There actually is corruption outside Canada's boarders too you know.

[Invertago]

But some of the 'responses' given have been good entertainment for an otherwise lousy Wednesday.

Exactly the purpose behind the thread, work is slow, time to stir the avcanada pot and see what floats to the surface. This is way better then just ignoring the email.

There seems to be a relationship between the activity on avcanada and the economy, when the economy is good, people are at work, when it is slow, avcanada livens up. At least we're keeping the Mods busy today lol. (How come the thread title still says "whore"?... someone is asleep at the wheel)