when he doesn't have his knife, he says it's more sacred than his wedding band, however, there is the security problem. So he goes to Cdn Tire or the local Five n Dime and picks one up for 2.99 +gst+pst and gives them away to the kiddies when he gets back. What the Kiddies do with them next is anyone's guess.Leatherman or Gerber
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bb lint
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Interesting that you mention that...just the other day a talked about this subject with an old school bush pilot who's also a good buddy of mine (yeah I got the odd friend--not everyone hates me) He now does alot of ferry piloting. (He flies one way commercial and brings back planes from the bush to civilisation) He freaks when he doesn't have his knife, he says it's more sacred than his wedding band, however, there is the security problem. So he goes to Cdn Tire or the local Five n Dime and picks one up for 2.99 +gst+pst and gives them away to the kiddies when he gets back. What the Kiddies do with them next is anyone's guess.
when he doesn't have his knife, he says it's more sacred than his wedding band, however, there is the security problem. So he goes to Cdn Tire or the local Five n Dime and picks one up for 2.99 +gst+pst and gives them away to the kiddies when he gets back. What the Kiddies do with them next is anyone's guess."Do you tink I’m crazy or someteen?"
- René Dahinden
- René Dahinden
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switchflicker
- Rank 5
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- Joined: Thu Aug 12, 2004 3:25 am
Swiss Army Knife
Considering that Switzerland is renowned for it’s neutrality, it’s somewhat strange that one of the country’s best-known exports is an army knife. I mean, have you actually thought of the military applications of the Swiss Army knife? At what precise moment in a military campaign would all the little saws come out? Is there a scenario envisioned by the Swiss top brass, with enemy hordes pouring through the Alpine passes only to be stopped when the desperate defenders whip out their red knives, open the saw blade and then….what? Cut down tiny trees? And what about the file? Is that to saw your way out of prison? To cut enemy lines? Or is it to wage war against that perfidious condition- the hangnail?
I personally own what I think of as the Drinker’s Model of the Swiss Army knife. A must for any serious imbiber, the Drinker’s Model has all the tools necessary to open absolutely anything that might possibly contain alcohol. There’s a corkscrew, a beer bottle opener, a can opener (either for peanuts or a particularly stubborn can of beer) and two knives for any drink that might require stabbing. There’s even a toothpick for assuming thoughtful poses and a tweezer for the removal of splinters received while hacking open a barrel. A couple of screw-drivers allow the drinker to unscrew cases of wine, or enter a boarded-up liquor store. Finally there’s a pair of small scissors for a pre-drink mustache trim.
The Swiss Army knife also provides proof of a parallel universe, I refer to overabundance of Swiss Army knife ‘losers’ and the disturbing lack of knife ‘finders’. I have lost many of these knives. I have found none. Nobody I know has found any. Where are they? Of course, it’s easy to say that they’ve run away with all the missing socks from the dryer, but I don’t believe it for a second.
Another odd thing about the Swiss Army knife is that there isn’t just one of them but two. Thanks to a gentleman’s agreement dating back to the late 1800s Victorinox makes the ‘original’ knife in Ibach, near the German border and Wenger makes the ‘genuine’ knife in Delmonte in the French-speaking canton of Jura. And yes, all Swiss soldiers are issued the knives, distributed by both companies on a 50-50 basis.
Between the two companies, they make a baffling array of knives. There are model for skiers, models for carpenters and even one for explorers. There are models to help you survive in the wilderness or just to make it through the day at the office. Victorinox turns out no less than 400 different combinations, and their most popular model, the Swiss Champ, has 33 different features. This knife includes a ball-point pen, a magnifying glass and a ruler. It weighs only 185 grams and is sure to rip the pocket of any pair of expensive pants that you own.
The average time between purchase and loss for someone like me is three days. Over the years I have discovered that the only way I can actually keep a Swiss Army knife is to store it in my shaving kit- only to be taken out (and immediately returned) when I need it.
As for the Swiss Army, soldiers and officers alike are required to have the knife with them at all times while on duty. But there are no regulations about where to keep it. A spokesman for the army said most soldiers choose their pants pocket, whether they’re outfitted for combat or dressed for more formal functions. Oddly enough, there is no army record of either destroyed pants pockets or high loss rates for its knives. There are 430,00 members in the Swiss militia, yet only 5000 extra knives are sold each year in its arsenals. That’s a loss rate of just one percent, which may point us toward the answer to one of life’s great mysteries: Maybe there’s a deep homing instinct that guides all of those missing knives back to the Swiss Army.
Jon Kalina
I personally own what I think of as the Drinker’s Model of the Swiss Army knife. A must for any serious imbiber, the Drinker’s Model has all the tools necessary to open absolutely anything that might possibly contain alcohol. There’s a corkscrew, a beer bottle opener, a can opener (either for peanuts or a particularly stubborn can of beer) and two knives for any drink that might require stabbing. There’s even a toothpick for assuming thoughtful poses and a tweezer for the removal of splinters received while hacking open a barrel. A couple of screw-drivers allow the drinker to unscrew cases of wine, or enter a boarded-up liquor store. Finally there’s a pair of small scissors for a pre-drink mustache trim.
The Swiss Army knife also provides proof of a parallel universe, I refer to overabundance of Swiss Army knife ‘losers’ and the disturbing lack of knife ‘finders’. I have lost many of these knives. I have found none. Nobody I know has found any. Where are they? Of course, it’s easy to say that they’ve run away with all the missing socks from the dryer, but I don’t believe it for a second.
Another odd thing about the Swiss Army knife is that there isn’t just one of them but two. Thanks to a gentleman’s agreement dating back to the late 1800s Victorinox makes the ‘original’ knife in Ibach, near the German border and Wenger makes the ‘genuine’ knife in Delmonte in the French-speaking canton of Jura. And yes, all Swiss soldiers are issued the knives, distributed by both companies on a 50-50 basis.
Between the two companies, they make a baffling array of knives. There are model for skiers, models for carpenters and even one for explorers. There are models to help you survive in the wilderness or just to make it through the day at the office. Victorinox turns out no less than 400 different combinations, and their most popular model, the Swiss Champ, has 33 different features. This knife includes a ball-point pen, a magnifying glass and a ruler. It weighs only 185 grams and is sure to rip the pocket of any pair of expensive pants that you own.
The average time between purchase and loss for someone like me is three days. Over the years I have discovered that the only way I can actually keep a Swiss Army knife is to store it in my shaving kit- only to be taken out (and immediately returned) when I need it.
As for the Swiss Army, soldiers and officers alike are required to have the knife with them at all times while on duty. But there are no regulations about where to keep it. A spokesman for the army said most soldiers choose their pants pocket, whether they’re outfitted for combat or dressed for more formal functions. Oddly enough, there is no army record of either destroyed pants pockets or high loss rates for its knives. There are 430,00 members in the Swiss militia, yet only 5000 extra knives are sold each year in its arsenals. That’s a loss rate of just one percent, which may point us toward the answer to one of life’s great mysteries: Maybe there’s a deep homing instinct that guides all of those missing knives back to the Swiss Army.
Jon Kalina
"I'd rather have it and not need than to need it and not have it" Capt. Augustus McCrae.
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Hey___Pilot
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Last edited by Hey___Pilot on Sun Feb 13, 2005 1:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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bb lint
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AWW heck...I wasnt gonna do this but WTF! You made it way too easy...Hey___Pilot wrote:whats a gerber or leatherman... Never heard of such a thing..
Gerber:
Leather man:
Now you know...sorry co-joe I had to use your photo without express permission.
"Do you tink I’m crazy or someteen?"
- René Dahinden
- René Dahinden
